Months that Suck: August


Well, it’s the last hoorah as we have reached full circle. It’s time to come together one last time as we chat about why August sucks. Without further ado, let’s chat about how horrible August is….

August is friggin’ hotter than hot. It’s like hell has opened up and decided to see how hot we can end summer on. Like, where was this during the months of May-July? That’s when all the fun happens. And it’s not even the enjoyable warm weather. It’s like the weather you get in July but turned up even worse. Like why does Mother Nature hate us so bad that she has to be so petty? I’m wanting it to be warm but it’s stupid to be hotter than balls outside. Sidenote: who came up with that saying anyway?

August is also the sign that it’s getting back to serious business for many. Vacations will soon be over, children will be heading back to school, and the weather will soon be changing next month to something colder. August is just depressing if you really think about it. It’s pretty much signaling the end of fun times. It’s kind of like “Oh shit, it’s going  to suck the next couple of months.” Sure, the weather isn’t going to be horrible for a few weeks, but it’s been super nice out since late-May. That’s been three straight months of just nice weather that super enjoyable and you don’t have to wear five different layers of clothing.

August is just that awkward month. It just really long. It doesn’t go fast, but rather it just goes slower. It’s dragging and just makes you beat your head off the wall because you don’t want the weather to end, minus the heat, but you just wish the month would hurry the fuck up. It’s just too much and way longer than what it should it be. Like you can take your time but just go a tad faster. Slow and steady may win the race but not when it is slower than a snail. C’mon now, August.

Doesn’t it feel better to get that off our chest? It was like a weight was lifted off my chest…or that could be just the Air Conditioning kicking in. Now that I don’t have months to complain about, what am I going to do with my time?

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