A letter for Coming Out Day

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Dear closeted LGBTQA+,

Today is National Coming Out Day. For many, coming out is way to finally express yourself without hiding who you are. Everyone should have the ability to be themselves without fear. Hiding who you are isn’t fun nor something that will make you happy. Being yourself, regardless of orientation or gender, is the best thing in the world.

Just because it’s Coming Out Day doesn’t mean you have to come out. Coming out is something that you should do when you feel you are ready. I believe that coming out to yourself is the hardest part, and the most important, of accepting yourself. You gotta accept yourself before you can expect anyone else to accept you. Accepting yourself takes time. It happens over time and at your own pace. You shouldn’t ever feel rushed when it comes to accepting yourself. Also, don’t come pair yourself to others. For some people, it was easy. For you, it might not be. Everyone experiences will different in life, and this is the same.

When you are ready to come out, the feeling that you get is something you cannot describe. It’s a mixture of relief and happiness. The movie “Love, Simon” explained it best when Simon’s mom said he can finally “breathe.” You can finally be yourself. There’s no more hiding if you find someone attractive nor if you want to do something that isn’t considered to be “cool.”  Coming out will open up so many more doors for you.

If you don’t feel comfortable or can’t safely come out, don’t. You can still enjoy life. Don’t put your life at risk. Also remember that even when it seems like there isn’t anyone on your side or you feel alone, you are not. There are many people who will like you for you. Don’t change yourself for others. If anyone doesn’t like you because of who love, you don’t need them. There are plenty of people in the world that will like you for you. Even if they are family, you don’t need them. They are plenty of people who will support you even if your family won’t.

Hopefully you find this letter helpful. Just remember to take your time and have faith. As corny as it sounds, it does get better over time. And if you are having issues or questions or hard times, there are plenty of resources out there like the Trevor Project. Until you do come out, use this day to be an ally to anyone that might need it. You might meet someone that could be in the same boat as you.

Stay positive and be you,


Steven Kaufman



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